I was a teenage gangster

So Fabian and I are pretty much almost completely moved out now. I know it's been a few months that we've been living here but we've pretty much gotten everything unpacked and in it's finally in it's own 'spot'.

A few days ago Fabian came home with a stack of CD's from his mum's house. I thought we were going to have to have a discussion about how CD's aren't a thing of the modern world and how I never could keep them inside their cases for more than 5 minutes. Luckily though he just wanted me to upload them to the computer before we tossed them out.

Halfway through the stack I found a burnt CD I'd made him after our first fight a few months into the relationship. I put it into the laptop and a tidal wave of nostalgia threatened to drown me, suddenly I was a teenager again.

I've realised that I'm at an age where I can think back to those days with a dreamy eyed fondness. I remember the pride with which I wore the label of 'Southlander' which merely indicated that I shoplifted from Southland and smoked cigarettes in the carpark while I waited for my mum to come and pick me up. It's with a chuckle that I reminisce how I had shaved lines into my eyebrows like a gangster though to be truthful I only followed through with wearing a bandaid on my face (for no reason) a few times.

My highschool jacket had an inside pocket that neatly fit my cigarette packet and it was with pride that I showed off my hideous tattoo in the library during class one day. I don't know when I slowly went from hood-rat gangster to dirty punk but it was sometime after high school and I've inexplicably retained some qualities of both of those phases in my life - thus the shaved head and the fact that I've been playing this CD on repeat since I found it.

Check this out y'all.

1. Two Wrongs
Claudette Ortiz and Wyclef Jean

2. U got it Bad

Usher

3. Suffocate

J. Holiday

4. Dilemma

Nelly and Kelly Rowland

5. Angel of Mine

Monica

6. All My Life

K-ci and JoJo

7. Always on Time

Ja Rule & Ashanti

8. One Call Away

Chingy & J. Weave

9. Baby Boy

Big Brovaz

10. Foolish

Ashanti

I find it hilarious and magical at the same time. If a million years from now aliens discovered all my journals and half-finished writings and this CD in the rubble of our home they would imagine we were star crossed lovers from 'the projects'.

Love NatAaliyah 

(Yes, seriously) x